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    Trying again to talk my wife into participating in a twosome

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    sinister_midget
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    Posts : 2460
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 64
    Location : Home

    Trying again to talk my wife into participating in a twosome

    Post  sinister_midget on Sat Dec 16, 2017 10:27 pm

    "Latte" is Latin for "You paid too much for that coffee."

    ----------

    My wife breathed a sigh of relief!

    Then she smashed the gizmo.


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    I figured out a way to prevent a zombie uprising.

    Tie everybody's shoelaces together before they're buried.


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    My sex life is a disaster. Last night the Red Cross showed up with coffee and donuts.


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    But both are dangerous.




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    My wife left me because of my addiction to anti-depressants.

    I guess I won't be needing those any more.


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    In the internet dating world, women are scared of meeting a murderer or rapist.

    Men are afraid of meeting someone fat.


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    It's finally come to this!




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    I call my wife Bambi. She loves it.

    She thinks it's because she's cute and has big brown eyes. But I use it because i want somebody to shoot her mother with a hunting rifle.


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    There was this guy in the coffee shop when I went in this morning. He wasn't on his iPhone. He wasn't on his iPad. He wasn't on a laptop. He was just sitting there. Like a psychopath.


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    Since it's in probably the best location in the city, I'm having trouble putting my finger on why the new Asian restaurant doesn't get more business.




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    China has reportedly run out of North Korean beer due to sanctions.

    I hate it when you can't enjoy your favorite beer after a 14 hour day assembling iPhones.

    Not to worry, though. The 8-year-old workers there are resilient.


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    Gotta be a government building.




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    This just in. Millions of Americans who died tragically after President Trump withdrew the United States from the Paris climate accord will now be forced to die again due the to repeal of Net Neutrality.


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    My many years of marriage have taught me that women spend more time thinking about what men are thinking than men do thinking of anything.


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    Only 8 more sleeps until Christmas!

    Unless you're a methhead. Then it's maybe one more.


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    I guess after all of these brave souls have come out to tell of their past abuse, I think it's high time I try to bring some peace back into my own life.

    So here goes.

    I was never groped by Donald Trump. But I was regularly screwed by Barack Obama.

    #MeTwo


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    Sure glad they put the sign up! Last time I stood out there for 3 hours before I finally got disgusted and went home.



    _________________
    One of the most important reasons for studying history is that
    virtually every stupid idea that is in vogue today has been tried
    before and proved disastrous before, time and again.
    --  Thomas Sowell
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    Joencalif2

    Posts : 550
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 67
    Location : Riverside Ca

    Re: Trying again to talk my wife into participating in a twosome

    Post  Joencalif2 on Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:10 pm

    What a FaceWhat a Face
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    Psycho144

    Posts : 680
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 77

    Re: Trying again to talk my wife into participating in a twosome

    Post  Psycho144 on Sun Dec 17, 2017 8:48 pm

    Laughing Laughing

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    Re: Trying again to talk my wife into participating in a twosome

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