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    The difference between a hippo and a Zippo is one is heavy while the other is a little lighter

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    sinister_midget
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    The difference between a hippo and a Zippo is one is heavy while the other is a little lighter

    Post  sinister_midget on Wed Nov 29, 2017 12:00 am

    Makes you wonder why he didn't give up altogether!




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    My friend showed me his new ear piercing. I hesitated to comment on it until I remembered which ear meant he was gay. Then I remembered.

    Any.


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    My wife always accuses me of having a favorite child.

    I keep informing that's not true. I love both Matthew and Not-Matthew equally.


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    The fact that Head and Shoulders doesn't have a body wash called Knees and Toes disappoints me almost as much as I disappoint my parents.


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    That's how it works these days!




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    "Now, I can't speak for everyone," says the wife.

    Although she does it all the time.


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    I have a pet chameleon that never changes color.

    I think he has a reptile dysfunction.


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    Busted!




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    "Japanese princess to give up royal status so she can marry a commoner "

    I'm sure that'll never come up when they're having an argument.


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    I have a trophy wife.

    It's just too bad the trophy isn't first place.


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    An article in the San Francisco Examiner reported that Nancy Pelosi sued Stanford Hospital, saying after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex.

    When the paper contacted the hospital, a spokesman stated, "Her husband was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was improve his eyesight."




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    I just read AIDS sufferers have a life expectancy of 30-40 years.

    No wonder Africans all want to get it. It can lengthen their lives by as much as three times!


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    My son's car wouldn't start. I told him to get dressed and I'd take him to work.

    I think the dog thought I was talking to him and said something about a walk.




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    What's the difference between a rocker and a jazzman?

    A rocker plays 4 chords in front of 40000 people. A jazzman plays 40000 chords in front of 4 people.


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    I guess she WAS telling the truth!




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    Embellishing his resume again?



    _________________
    One of the most important reasons for studying history is that
    virtually every stupid idea that is in vogue today has been tried
    before and proved disastrous before, time and again.
    --  Thomas Sowell
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    Joencalif2

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    Age : 67
    Location : Riverside Ca

    Re: The difference between a hippo and a Zippo is one is heavy while the other is a little lighter

    Post  Joencalif2 on Wed Nov 29, 2017 7:27 am

    What a FaceWhat a FaceWhat a FaceWhat a Face
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    Psycho144

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    Age : 77

    Re: The difference between a hippo and a Zippo is one is heavy while the other is a little lighter

    Post  Psycho144 on Wed Nov 29, 2017 8:30 am

    Laughing Laughing

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    Re: The difference between a hippo and a Zippo is one is heavy while the other is a little lighter

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