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    Another Monday!

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    sinister_midget
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    Posts : 1572
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 64
    Location : Home

    Another Monday!

    Post  sinister_midget on Mon Jul 17, 2017 8:09 am

    'Sorry' seems to be the hardest word to say.

    Unless you're Chinese. Then it's 'squirrel.'

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    Which is straighter?

    It's up for a vote. Make yours count!




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    I'm waiting for the AMA to declare "investigating Hillary Clinton" as a leading cause of death.

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    9 out of 10 dermatologists agree that towels are the leading cause of dry skin.

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    Got herself a shirt.



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    If guns kill people, do pencils misspell words?

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    Sarah Palin caught grief for saying she could see Russia from her house.

    The same people who gave it to her are now seeing Russia everywhere.

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    From sleepin' wit da fishes?



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    I was talking to my Muslim neighbor.

    "Your wife wears a burka. Your three daughters wear burkas. Doesn't it get a little confusing sometimes?"

    He said, "Yes, of course. Last week I went upstairs in the night and accidentally had sex with my wife."

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    A man called the hotel manager.

    He said, "Come up quickly, my wife and I had a fight! Now she wants to jump out the window!"

    The manager replied, "Sir this is a personal matter and we can't get involved. I can call sec..."

    The man interrupted, "No! This is a maintenance issue. The window won't open!"

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    I have a confession. After all these years my conscience is so bad I can't sleep at night!

    It was me. I let the dogs out.

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    I just saw a poor old woman fall over and knock herself out.

    At least I think she was poor. She only had $5 on her.

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    Exercise can add years to your life.

    I just ran down the driveway to the mailbox and I feel like I'm 89.

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    Thought I might take a trip to Europe.

    Then again.....



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    With all of the "suicides" by people associated with the Clintons, maybe they should start writing their "suicide" notes on Clinton stationary.

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    About time somebody did this! Now maybe the snowflakes and SJWs will finally understand.



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    My mother-in-law came over for dinner last night. When we sat down it didn't take her long to start moaning.

    "Why is the dog sitting there staring at me?"

    I told her, "Because you're using his plate."


    _________________
    Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem.
    (I prefer dangerous freedom over peaceful slavery.)
    -- Thomas Jefferson
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    Joencalif2

    Posts : 402
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 67
    Location : Riverside Ca

    Re: Another Monday!

    Post  Joencalif2 on Mon Jul 17, 2017 10:47 am

    Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
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    Psycho144

    Posts : 499
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 77

    Re: Another Monday!

    Post  Psycho144 on Mon Jul 17, 2017 1:44 pm

    Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
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    JJRobinson

    Posts : 446
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 70
    Location : Texas

    Re: Another Monday!

    Post  JJRobinson on Tue Jul 18, 2017 6:50 am

    Laughing

      Current date/time is Fri Jul 21, 2017 3:40 am