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    Not April Fool time just yet

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    sinister_midget
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    Not April Fool time just yet

    Post  sinister_midget on Thu Mar 30, 2017 11:26 pm

    Chelsea's new book goes on sale soon!



    It's expected to be even more popular than her previous tome.



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    Why do Jewish men like to watch porno movies backwards?

    They like the part where the prostitute gives the money back.

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    Do radical feminists get pissed off when men insist on paying the bill at the end of a date?

    Trick question! Radical feminists don't get asked out on dates

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    That's easy. The one on the left is a copycat.




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    Hollywood executives: Four more Transformers films to be released over the next decade. Unless our demands are met.

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    Why is it prohibited for lawyers to have sex with their clients?

    To prevent clients from being billed twice for the same service.

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    Chelsea Clinton says she won't run for office. No comment yet on whether or not she will run in this year's Preakness.

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    Saudi Arabia finally loosens the laws, allowing women to drive for the first time!




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    I've decided to write all of my jokes in capitals from now on.

    This one was written in Topeka.

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    I was going to say a few words at my mother-in-law's funeral. But I found it to be one of the most difficult things I could ever do.

    I just couldn't stop laughing!

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    Leave 'em alone. They're doing a great job all by themselves!




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    I just watched 3 people jog by my window and it inspired me.

    All the motivation I needed to shut the curtains.

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    "Kicking ass and forgetting names!" - Alzheimer's Fight Club

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    With my BB gun




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    While I was on vacation in Spain I saw a sign: "ENGLISH SPEAKING DOCTOR"

    I thought, what a great idea! We should have those in America!

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    I took a trip in one of those driverless cars yesterday.

    Well, it was a normal car with my wife behind the wheel. But same thing.

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    Sorry. It's as real as the other one.




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    I think I first realized my drinking was out of control when the doctor referred me to a Bacardiologist.

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    I just arrived in St Louis to surprise my fiance.

    She's in Seattle. And the wedding's in an hour.

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    I bought some London Bridge jeans yesterday.

    Even with a belt they fall down.

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    I only drink on two occasion:

    1. when it's my birthday

    2. when it's not my birthday

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    I'm beginning to think some of my coworkers are gay. Every time I walk by a few of them I hear them whisper "What an ass!"

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    I can honestly tell you I'm thrilled that the government is building a big new housing project in my area that will become home to lots of Muslims and other minorities.

    I've been hired as a guard at the new prison.

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    My son asked me for an example of misplaced confidence for a paper he was working on. I told him it was his homework, so he should look it up.

    He called me in when he finished and asked if I thought this was a good enough example.




    He's either getting an "A" or an "F"


    _________________
    Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem.
    (I prefer dangerous freedom over peaceful slavery.)
    -- Thomas Jefferson
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    JJRobinson

    Posts : 480
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 70
    Location : Texas

    Re: Not April Fool time just yet

    Post  JJRobinson on Fri Mar 31, 2017 6:31 am

    Very Happy
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    Psycho144

    Posts : 526
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 77

    Re: Not April Fool time just yet

    Post  Psycho144 on Fri Mar 31, 2017 9:38 am

    Very Happy Surprised
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    Joencalif2

    Posts : 429
    Join date : 2016-08-26
    Age : 67
    Location : Riverside Ca

    Re: Not April Fool time just yet

    Post  Joencalif2 on Fri Mar 31, 2017 2:09 pm

    Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

      Current date/time is Wed Aug 16, 2017 10:51 pm